I work at Trent Bridge Cricket Ground in
their Commercial Department and live in West Bridgford, just a stone’s
throw from the venue itself. I have loved cricket since I was a
teenager although wished I could spend more time watching it than
currently allows.

I am in a relationship with the lovely
Karyn (who I met in August 2008 on the Great Wall of China). She lives
down in Sussex which is tough but we make it work. She is fractionally
taller than your average dwarf and is 62% breast. She makes me smile
and I don’t make her cry that often, so I think things are going pretty
well!

I’m a graduate of Oxford Brookes
University where I studied publishing and politics, a degree which has
so far not been entirely useful in my chosen line of work. However, I
hope that will change when I finally get round to writing and
publishing  a book about my journey around the world visiting all the
places called Nottingham which I undertook in 2006, following what can
only be described as an ‘interesting’ period of my life.

I like a bit of adventure and have been
known to throw myself off bridges and out of planes in search of a bit
of an adrenaline high and in 2008 completed my first (and probably
only) full marathon, having run about half a dozen half-marathons prior
to that.

In my spare time, I love going to comedy
clubs and  doing pub quizzes (yet sadly I’m told this doesn’t make me
any more funny or intelligent).

I require special attention at regular intervals and my drip needs refilling three times a day. “Oh Nurse….”

Whilst I’m
in reflective and also forward thinking mode, I thought I’d make some
suggestions for what I think may or may not happen to both myself and the world
in 2010:

• Nottinghamshire sport will
  prosper on the field – Forest will get promoted to the Premiership, Notts County will get to the Play-Off
  Final of League 2 and Notts Outlaws will make great inroads into the
  Friends Provident Twenty20 Cup, making Finals Day before succumbing in the
  semi-finals.
• Sven Goran-Erikkson will not be
  Director of Football at Notts
  County on 31^st
  December 2010.
• England will make the semi-finals of
  the FIFA World Cup.
• The Conservative Party will win
  the general election with a 110 seat majority over Labour and a 12 seat majority overall.
• The Democrats will lose control
  of Congress in the November mid-terms in the US.
• I will attempt an adrenaline
  sport I have not tried before when I go to Australia in March.
• I will finally finish the book.
• I will average six or more
  articles a month on this blog.
• I will run at least two
  half-marathons.
• I will move down to Sussex.

It
certainly promises to be an interesting year, whatever happens.

A month or so ago, I was asked to produce an index for a book that has been published today by Biteback Publishing, a recently created publisher of political titles co-owned by one of Britain's most influential bloggers, Iain Dale. 

I used to work for Iain many moons ago when he owned Politico's and I was very pleased to hear that he was getting back together with Sean Magee and John Schwarz to form the new venture.

Anyway, the book in question is called The Art of Consultation and whilst the title made me dread its contents, I actually found it to be a very accessible book about a subject that for most of us will come to effect us in some way, shape or form in our lives – whether on a personal level dealing with local authorities or through professional necessity.

The two authors, Rhion Jones and Elizabeth Gammell clearly know their stuff and whilst a lot of their thinking is pure common-sense, they are able to pinpoint more than enough examples of where big institutions get the process so horrendously wrong, through ignorance, arrogance or sheer ineptitude.

Anyway, it's well worth a read and you can buy a copy here.  

Even I hadn't seen any stand-up since June.

Fortunately, Komedia, in the heart of Brighton's North Laine, did not disappoint and we came away very happy with our lot when we visited on Saturday night.

The compere, Tiffany Stevenson, was very sharp but rather sweet with it – a genuine article that wanted everybody to enjoy themselves but didn't take any prisoners either. I knew I recognised her from somewhere and a quick Google search when I got home told me she'd been in The Office many moons ago.

First act up was Jimmy McGhie, a southern comic who made light of his geographical predicament (especially when faced with a room full of 400 baying Geordies recently) and won himself a lot of new fans with his self-effacing style of delivery.

The middle act was the most disappointing of the evening in my opinion: Ninia Benjamin. She had the ability to be funny but at times was just too interested in talking about anal sex for the fun of it and, in all honesty, tried just a little bit too hard for my liking. Still, she wasn't the worst I've ever seen by any stretch of the imagination and a few bits were laugh-out-loud.

The final act was Phil Nichol, who despite being a little slow out of the blocks made up for it with his final ditty of the evening: 'I'm the Only Gay Eskimo in my Tribe' which was made even funnier when he was joined up on stage by Ben, a great lad who he'd been making comical advances towards for the previous quarter of an hour. The two sung the final verse as if they were Sonny and Cher (except more attractive). For a member of the audience (if he was) he was pure class.

So, all in all a very fun evening and I can't wait to head back again soon.

This morning, I got this letter (below) which just defies so much belief that it had me in stitches. 

The address at the bottom which I've marked out is real (and according to Google Maps shows a property with both front and back gardens, so the inhabitants aren't doing too badly).

On the other hand, I suppose it will only take one gullible person to make the venture worthwhile.

Given his respiratory condition, I'd be worried if anybody did send him any cash as it could tip him over the edge.

In the last eight days, I have had the pleasure of seeing Paul Merson live at The Approach in Nottingham, judging a beer festival, finding a great new pub in Nottingham and have the privilege of a 'lock-in' with the landlord and also seeing the 'king' of modern comedy, Ricky Gervais, down in Oxford. Oh yes, and I became a Godfather after Jenny finally gave birth to little Anna-Mia (see below) on Sunday morning.

The amount of damage done to my liver is enough to make me want to go cold turkey for the next week or so.

I'm in desperate need of a lie-down.

Below is Rollo Markee, a great blues singer and his band, the Tailshakers, who we saw on Saturday night at 'The Guitar Bar' in Carrington. This was pure swing blues at its best and it was a real shame that there were only about a dozen of us there to appreciate it.

I was just in time to see the end of the post-match presentations – Notts were 57 all out (with Akhil Patel scoring 41 of those) and Gloucestershire knocked off the required runs in just seven and a half overs!

Still, on the plus side it meant we could celebrate the end of the season a few hours earlier than we'd intended and were soon forgetting the travails of every One Day competition this summer and concentrating more on a well-earned second-place finish in the Championship – a position that had seen every player receive an unprecedented bonus in the wake of the increased prize-money available in the competition this year.

Apparently, I spent a good chunk of the evening telling Mark Ealham that I was definitely going to put money on his seven year old son, George, playing for England one day. Despite his age, the boy's got talent in abundance and he comes from good stock (Mark's Dad, Alan, of course played for England in the 1970s and Mark played a fair few Tests and ODIs during the 1990s).

Scarily though, I think 2010 will be here before we know it. 

The first time I ever laid eyes on Michael McIntyre was about eighteen months ago when he was on a panel show – I think it was Mock the Week. I thought he was awful. I mean, he really grated on me.

Then, earlier this year, a friend lent me his stand-up DVD and I was in tears. It was brilliant. 

About a month later, the same friend asked if I wanted to go and see him live. I said 'yes' straight away.

I wasn't totally sure that he'd be any good – I dreaded that it might be a bit Peter Kay-esque where much of it would rely on previous jokes and catchphrases but there was little of that. He is just a genuinely refreshing comedy talent – incredibly camp but full of wonderfully acute social observations.

He is, of course, making hay while the sun shines and was visibly grateful for the turnout at the end – he knows it could all end tomorrow but I think he's got some mileage in him yet!

'Go Ape' is one of those activities that people have been telling me I ought to do for years, but I must confess that I always thought it looked a bit babyish. Alas, having just returned from the Forest of Dean after a weekend of high jinx camping et al, I can readily assure you that it is anything but easy.

I have used muscles that have clearly never been awoken before and as such are still aching now!

I took the 'hard' route wherever it was presented and despite being safely connected, you still can't help feeling that you're going to drop to your death. My poor hand-to-eye means that I had to triple check I was secure at every stage of the course.

I feared more for my more delicate parts, especially when a six foot drop swing onto a cargo net really does take the wind from your… well, you know what I mean!

Anyway, we had a great time and even Karyn's sister, Zoey, made it round despite having a phobia of heights – definitely want to do it again!

Last night, I and a group of cerebral colleagues from Trent Bridge pitted our wits against over 30 other teams in the annual Notts County Lifeline Quiz at Meadow Lane. And lo and behold, we only went and won. 

This isn't something that happens very often and therefore I was slightly overcome with the euphoric urge to celebrate by having a few pints afterwards in the Trent Navigation Inn, next door to Meadow Lane.

This was only the second time I'd ever set foot in the place since it had been refurbished a year ago and we immediately got chatting with the bar staff and the landlady. Before I knew it, my friends had left and it was 1.45pm. I looked at the landlady, who had been good enough to let me stay behind, and told her I had to make tracks. Next thing I knew, I was in her car getting a lift home.

You don't expect that sort of treatment in a pub when you're a 'local', let alone a complete stranger!

So, Laura – thanks very much and I'll be back in soon!

Incidentally, our prize was a hospitality box for 12 people at any Magpies game this season. We're going to see what the FA Cup brings in January before committing to anything too exciting like a glamour tie with Hereford at the end of February.

Just been sent this by ONE.org from last night's show.

Probably hasn't done anything to dispel those rumours…

Willie Williams must have the best and worst job in the world.

Having been U2's set designer since the early 80s, he has created some structural and visual masterpieces (think the interactive extravaganzas of Zooropa in the early 90s and the giant Lemon on the Popmart tour of 97/98) that have captured the hearts and minds of music fans around the world.

Every time he manages to out-do himself and this latest tour is no exception, but it must be a logistical nightmare to import the spcaeship like structure from venue to venue and make sure every single cog and screw does what it's meant to do in order to ensure a smooth show for both artists and fans alike. He could well have been employed as one of NASA's top honchos had Bono and the boys not kept him so preoccupied for the last thirty years.

Anyway, the show was electric and despite Nick and I nearly losing each other for the duration of the gig (if he hadn't taken his brolly as a marker beacon, we'd have never have found one another in between toilet breaks), we were reunited for a two hour blitz of old and new from the Dubliners, with of course a little bit of politics thrown in with Bono's now usual appeals for the release of Burma's Aung San Suu Kyi and a slightly comical plea from Desmond Tutu on the giant panoramic screen for us all to act as 'one' before the band launched into their masterpiece of the same name.

All in all, it was a great night and despite early misgivings about the Don Valley, I have to say I was very impressed with the venue and its staff – all very friendly and laid back. The mood and the weather was perfect and it will long live in the memory.

A few weeks ago, I got an email at work from a lady called Kerry, who asked if she and her friends could come and do a naked calendar photoshoot at Trent Bridge in order to raise money for Jo's Trust, a charity that offers medical advice and sipport to those suffering from cervical cancer and their families.

Below is a list of all the titles for which I have prepared indexes for:

The Art of Consultation
by Rhion Jones and Elizabeth Gammell (Biteback, paperback, 2009)

Crossing the Zambezi: The Politics of Landscape on a Central African Frontier
by Joann McGregor (James Currey, hardback, 2009)

Shifting Alliances: Europe, America and the Future of Britain's Global Strategyby Patrick Diamond (Politico's, hardback, 2008)

I Don't Like Politics - But I Want To Make A Differenceby John Redwood (Politico's, hardback, 2006)

Women in Parliament: The New Suffragettesby Boni Sones and Margaret Moran (Politico's, hardback, 2005)

How To Go To Warby Andrew Blick (Politico's, paperback, 2005)

Winston and Archie: The Collected Correspondence of Winston Churchill and Sir Archibald Sinclairby Ian Hunter (ed) (Politico's, papaerback, 2005) 

Themes in West Africa's Historyby Emmaneul Akyeampong (James Currey, hardback, 2005)

The Rebels: How Blair Mislaid His Majorityby Philip Cowley (Politico's, paperback, 2005)

University to Uni: The Politics of Higher Educationby Robert Stevens (Politico's, hardback, 2004)

The Political Legacy of Margaret Thatcher: Freedom Regainedby Stainslao Pugilese and Iain Dale (ed) (Politico's, hardback, 2003)

Here Today Gone Tomorrow: Recollections of an Errant Politicianby John Nott (Politico's, paperback, 2003)

Politico's Guide To Local Governmentby Andrew Stevens (Politico's, hardback, 2003)

The Spying Gameby Michael Smith (Politico's, paperback, 2003)

I have a very keen interest in politics, history and sports, although I would be willing to turn my hand to anything! 

My fee would be £1.10 per page of the book and I pride myself on a quick turnaround time.

If you have any manuscripts that require a professionally produced index, please do not hesitate to contact me via email at apicker @ hotmail . com (ignore spaces).

It's felt like ages since I went to a gig but if you're going to choose one gig to re-ignite your passion, it has to be Oasis appearing on home turf.

The venue, Heaton Park, based on the outskirts of Manchester, near Bury and Rochdale is a cracking proposition whose last guest of any notoriety was the Pope in 1982 – so it was quite a day to cherish.

Our conscientious time-keeping was rewarded with front pit access and a great view of the stage. Manchester's first musical sons were being ably supported throughout the day by Reverend and the Makers (standing in for the illness-stricken The Enemy), as well as Kasabian and Twisted Wheel.

The weather defied all forecasts and stayed very pleasant (although by the time the headliners came on, most people had been drenched in far less savoury liquids than rainwater) and the venue seemed well suited to handling the volume of people.

Everything was going fine – on the came with their usual swagger and launched into 'Rock and Roll Star' which was great but noticeable in that Liam wasn't as amplified as maybe he would've liked. At the end of the song, they stormed off stage leaving everybody a little bewildered as to what was going on (see video here).

Ten minutes passed before they returned. The problem, it seemed, had been solved. Without much explanation, they kicked into 'Lyla' and again the crowd took off.

By the end of that, they were off again. Ten minutes passed, then fifteen, by which point an announcement was put up on the TV screen saying that there was a problem with the generators. It was half an hour before they returned in a very apologetic mood, vowing that every punter would be entitled to a FULL refund. Considering that's 70,000 people at £40 a pop, it would be a very expensive night for the band and their promoters.

To be fair, the rest of the gig (which lasted twenty minutes past the local Council's 11pm curfew) was as you would expect – fantastic! Even Noel espoused his regret at promising a refund at the end:

"Kind of regret offering you your money back now. Apply for it back if you wanna be a c*nt, we'll do our best for you."

I think you'd have to be pretty harsh to want a full refund – it was still a great gig (although a friend had sorted the tickets out, so I don't have the right to preach anyway!), but it will be interesting to see how many do.

The shuttle buses idea didn't quite work as the crowds took over the whole road outside the Park and we actually walked for an hour and a quarter to reach our car and beat most of the buses there.

A long day ended at 3.30am but it was worth the effort and the slight technical difficulties.

Could well be the most expensive powercut in musical history.

Arriving at 7am to help set-up I could just feel it was going to be a good day. There is something eerily serene about being in a town centre so early in the morning – especially on a gorgeous summer’s day.

By 9am we were ready to go although we weren’t officially opening our doors until 10am. Amongst the activities were an inflatable batting cage and bowling lane, along with a skills zone and also a rig provided for us by the ECB Cricket Factory, a great initiative that tours the country.

As I gazed at the early punters who were queuing patiently, I was slightly taken aback by the chap at the front. It appeared that our first budding cricketer of the day was a 79-year old chap (on his own) who seemed genuinely eager to show his worth on the ladders in our skills zone and then have a swing with a bat.

We all stood awestruck as the gates opened and he ventured in. Was this our Susan Boyle or even Fred-what’s-his-name, the breakdancing Grandad from Britain’s Got Talent who’s now being investigated by the DSS.

In he came and proved to everybody there that age is no barrier (see pic below).

The day saw hundreds of kids pick up a bat and a ball for the first time in their lives and the sun shone all day. With chirpy Ted on the PA regailing passers-by with stories about, well, anything that popped into his head, the whole day could was deemed to have been an overwhelming success. Despite it being my 13th straight day of work, it’s days like these when you don’t really mind.

Not to everybody's taste

Just seen this nugget on the Nottingham Evening Post website.

It would appear this little turf war has become Badlands indeed.

I’ve just seen the BBC’s article here over Hazel Blears’ comments regarding the fine dished out to the Corporation by Ofcom this week over the Jonahan Ross / Russell Brand prank calls controversy last September.

She said the following on the BBC’s ‘Any Questions?’ programme:

“The BBC is funded by all of us as licence-payers, so actually, are we having to pay the fine?”

“Then I thought maybe Jonathan Ross and Russell Brand should pay it. That might be quite a good idea.”

I know many politicians have been keen to throw in their two penny’s worth over this issue in the last six months, but I wish they’d stop politicising the situation – Brand and Ross were stupid for doing what they did but they paid a penalty with a P45 in Brand’s case and a lengthy suspension from the airwaves in Ross’.

Whilst both have more than enough money to comfortably pay the fine (£150,000), the point is that it was the BBC itself that allowed the show to be broadcast (it had been recorded 48 hours prior to being aired) and therefore, like any employer, it has to accept overall responsibility for the behaviour of its employees.

Blears would do well to remember that she is in danger of setting an exceptional precedent and potentially one that could affect both her and her public sector colleagues.

There are more than enough examples of when government departments or state-backed institutions (such as the banks that have been bailed out) have acted inappropriately and have been subject to fines or other penalties. If individuals are to blame, then they are generally fired but it is almost ridiculous to think that they would be forced to carry the financial burden themselves, otherwise we’d have a bunch of bankrupts running the country (insert joke here).

I went to the cinema this evening to see the silver screen story of Brian Clough’s ill-fated 44-day tenure as manager of Leeds United in 1974.

‘The Damned United’ (based on David Peace’s book of the same name) has come in for a lot of criticism since it was published three years ago and the Clough family themselves have taken great offence and have vowed to boycott the film at all costs.

Whilst the book doesn’t paint the great man in a very endearing light, the film, however, treats him with far more sympathy.

Michael Sheen, who appears to have created a cracking little cottage industry as this country’s finest character mimic, is first-class as the flawed genius, whilst Timothy Spall does a great turn as his long-suffering professional partner, Peter Taylor. After Taylor suffers a heart attack whilst with Clough at Derby County, he lies upright in his hospital bed and confides in Clough:

When the Doctors asked if I had any medical conditions, I told them that I shared my professional life with Brian Clough. They seemed to understand.

I was only half joking, Brian!

Don Revie (played with a scary amount of realism by Colm Meaney) does not come out of the film well, nor do Billy Bremner or Johnny Giles (although I believe that Giles has successfully sued Peace for misrepresentation in the book). Giles describes his objection to the film and book on the BBC here.

Those main protagonists, supported by their fellow team-mates, are portrayed as anti-Clough conspirators from the outset – their reluctance to change their ugly style of football meant that with Clough at the helm, the team and him were always going to be uncomfortable bedfellows.

It must be remembered of course that the book (and therefore the film in turn) has turned a factual event (i.e. Clough’s reign at Elland Road) and showered the situation with a sizeable dose of ficticious sensationalism.

There are talks already of a sequel surrounding his more successful 18-year spell as manager at Nottingham Forest, during which time he obviously brought more success than will probably ever be seen again at the City Ground.

I hope this film does well, as I would love to that sequel be made and for Cloughie to get the true recognition he deserves, but it does need to be remembered that it is ‘faction’ and should be taken with a pinch of salt.

Just seen this video.

This woman is a great example to all local goverment (and indeed central government) figures around the world.

She is the Mayor of the sixth biggest city in Canada and has been for 31 years, winning eleven elections, including the last one with 92% of the vote.

Oh yes, and her city is debt-free with a $700 million surplus.

She seems to have that grounded, common-sensical approach that is sadly missing from many of our world’s democracies at the moment.

Can we have some of what she’s had over here please?

Over a year ago, I got a Nintendo DS for my birthday but am ashamed to say that until yesterday I hadn’t really touched it since receiving it.

However, having purchased ‘More Brain Training’, I sat down this afternoon and decided to give it a go.

Boy, was I in for a shock.

Apparently, after a preliminary set of tests, I possess the brain of a 59 year old. And I don’t think that’s classed as a good thing.

I seem to be very good with things like ‘Correct Change’ (well, I’ve done enough retail jobs in my life) but seemed to struggle with things like ‘Word Merge’ (which probably has more to do with my lack of hearing ability than anything else).

Anyway, it has shamed me enough that I will now be waking up extra early every day to give myself a mental workout before I go and face the world.

I haven’t stayed in and watched TV for ages and it’s been a good night tonight.

I’m just watching ‘Clough’ on ITV1 and it really is insightful, if only to show the FA as the bunch of idiots we always knew they were, even back in 1977, when they opted for Ron Greenwood over Cloughie for the England job.

Fortunately, Lancaster Gate’s loss was Nottingham’s perpetual gain.

On a totally personal note, I remember being 8 years old and waiting for players’ autographs outside the Forest Dressing Rooms over Christmas 1990. The players had been out training and before I knew what was going on, the great man emerged from nowhere, took my hand and began to lead me off away from my Dad.

He led me into his office and proceeded to sign a black and white photo for me and started to ask me about my own playing aspirations. I told him I played for my local cub scout team and although the exact advice he dished out eludes me now, nineteen years on, I remember cherishing the experience and bragging to all my schoolmates when we got back after the holidays.

Whilst he certainly had his problems towards the end, football should always remember him for the legend that he was and still is. I definitely will.

I have just been watching Alan Whicker on BBC2 as he looks back over his long and fascinating career in the media.

It has been a really phenomenal insight into how society began to change from the 1960s onwards and seeks to remind us quite how influential a trailblazer like Whicker was in bringing us more knowledge about not only individuals such as the reclusive billionaire, John Paul Getty but also about the aspirations of baby-boomers from different classes and also issues such as fox-hunting and divorce reform to name but a few.

I can remember being quite young, maybe 11 or 12 and buying a book by Whicker from a car boot sale, never really having heard of him before. I read it wide-eyed and dreamt of following in his footsteps one day. The jet-setting was just one aspect of it, but as somebody who was lucky enough to meet a lot of celebrities in person as a child, I also admired him for the way in which he would effortlessly deviate from interviewing the world’s A-list to mere mortals in the street with the same amount of suave debonair and charm.

I can’t wait until next week’s episode.

I was dreading not being able to get standing tickets and being stuck in a seat at the opposite end of the arena to the stage.

My Mum once went to the Don Valley years ago to see Pavarotti and she said her seats were that bad she could barely make him out.

As he was far from diminuitive, I’d have had no hope with Bono.

It’s rare that you get days when somebody wants to take a photograph of at work – unless you’re paid millions as a sportsman or sponge off the taxpayer in the case of some of our less scrupulous public servants, it’s not a situation you find yourself in every day.

However, whilst working on my market stall at Aston Villa yesterday, I was approached by a lad called Rich who said he was doing a university project about the local community and wanted to include my picture.

So, here I am.

“Get your hats, flags, t-shirts and scarves!”

PS. Don’t you just love the bumbag?

For the first time in ages, I went to the Just the Tonic comedy club last night where Daniel Kitson was trying out some new material and was being ably supported by two comedians called Matt Kirchin (a Brit who’s far bigger in the States than over here) and Dan Antopolski (a middle-aged Jewish lad who looks a fair bit like your average geography teacher, pictured above).

Whilst Kitson was in good form, the highlight was Antopolski who not only provided us with visual evidence of the number of swear words and their plural equivalents on Google but also performed what is the best rap by a caucasian I have ever seen (it was primarily based around what would constitute a good and a bad sandwich filling) and the highlight was basically an ode to Midge Ure and the rest of Ultravox being a positive example of a top bite.

Despite only being a warm-up for Kitson, within 15 minutes of leaving the stage, compere and owner, Darrell, informed us that Dan had been booked for a gig all of his own on Sunday 5th July.

I’ll be there.

Hey mate. I’m three tracks in. What are your thoughts? Think I like it so far – take it we’re going to see them whenever dates are released.

He was of course referring to U2′s new album, ‘No Line on the Horizon’, which was released on Monday.

I had it on in Karyn’s car whilst we travelled up to Center Parcs for the day and I sense it will be an album that grows on me – there are a few great tracks – ‘Magnificent’ really stood out for me, whilst others will take a bit of time.

It’s not a bad album by any stretch of the imagination, but it doesn’t strike me as a U2 classic in the mould of ‘Joshua Tree’, ‘Achtung Baby’ or more recent efforts such as ‘All That You Can’t Leave Behind’ and ‘How To Dismantle an Atomic Bomb’.

I’ll definitely be going to see them this summer tho!

Just been to watch Rob Brydon at Nottingham’s Royal Concert Hall with Karyn and a couple of other friends, Helen and Matt.

Our unanimous verdict was one of disappointment – whilst he is one of our great character actors – he does not really adapt to stand-up as well as maybe he should do. Maybe he’s still on a steep learning curve, but he relied far too heavily on overly-crass audience-bashing, which invariably involved lowest common denominator ridicule of those unlucky enough to find themselves in the first five rows of the stalls.

Don’t get me wrong – certain bits were funny – but not enough.

On a more positive note, his warm-up act, Hal Cruttenden, possibly the campest straight comic on the circuit was a joy to behold and certainly somebody who we will see more of as time progresses. 

I’d happily have paid to watch him all night.

Ridley Scott has apparently laid out his new vision for the new Robin Hood blockbuster set for release next year.

In an article here, there is talk that the Sheriff will play less of a role than in all other adaptations of the legend:

So, rather than the Robin-vs.-Sheriff showdowns we’ve come to expect from “Robin Hood” movies, Scott has instead employed the history of the time to make an entire country the villain. “It is from France. It is the French,” he insisted. “The villain is much bigger in that sense; much more important, and much more dangerous.”

“[In] 1066 Harold II went against William the Conqueror. Harold took an arrow in his eye, and William the Conqueror took over England, and so France owned everything right through,” Scott explained of the turmoil of that age. “Even to the extent of changing the architecture of the churches from Anglo-Saxon to Roman, that’s French; they changed the arches in the churches.”

Could be interesting.

The night was a good laugh and was relatively well attended for a midweek occasion.

The highlight of the evening for me was a joke by Stone towards the end of the evening:

This country’s gone to pot y’know. We used to be an Empire run by an Empress. Then we were a Kingdom run by a King. Now we’re just a country…

There was no need for him to finish.

There are 5 judging criteria for deciding on an overall mark for each beer – its initial appearance (the clearer the better as a rule of thumb, although it’s not vital), its aroma, its flavour and subsequent aftertaste and finally (and most importantly as a punter) whether it has enough marketability to warrant buying another pint.

Anyway, I found myself judging the Strong Ales (above 5.6%) and Bottled Beers. There were five of us on our table – myself and Dave (the manager of Nottingham Castle and the bloke that roped me into the whole affair) and then three people who had a collective total of about a century in the trade and were able to offer some very useful scientific titbits (as well as some great stories about beers from around the globe).

Despite not being too savvy on the science side of things – Dave and I are both keen drinkers of the real stuff and we know what we like and by the end we had tasted a lot of quality ales (and were not afraid to disagree with our more experienced and distinguished fellow judges) along with a few horrible ones, although due to the judging being conducted on a blind basis, we had no idea what was disagreeing with our palletes.

The entrants were as follows:

Strong Beers:

Bottled Beers:

I hope I get invited back again next year as it really is a great way to spend an afternoon.

The winners will be announced on 5th March at SIBA’s National Convention.

1. I have lived at 8 different addresses in my life, including 3 in the last year.

2. I have a 100% success rate of picking the Grand National winner (1 out of 1 attempt is pretty damn good, I think!).

3. Despite livng with a German, my grasp of the language is abysmal although I do know how to ask for directions to the station – praise be to Mr Whitehead!

4. I have run a marathon. I will never do another one!

5. I love and miss Oxford.

6. I have very poor hand-to-eye co-ordination.

7. I do not like nightclubs.

8. I am told I do a good Brummie accent.

9. I believe in ‘what goes around, comes around’.

10. I would like to run my own bookshop and publishing house one day.

11. The funniest name I have ever heard is Larry Bumgardener.

12. My current relationship is (I believe) my longest.

13. I prefer fact to fiction.

14. I am rubbish at replying to text messages.

15. I still have a profile on Sarah Beeny’s ‘Mysinglefriend.com’ dating website. I should probably remove that at some point.

16. I went to watch both Forest and County at the old Wembley in my first full season as a football fan.

17. I attract my fair share of weirdos. Not that I claim to be that normal.

18. I am easily distracted.

19. I have never owned a credit card.

20. I would be interested in studying psychology in the future.

21. I have stared death in the face three times.

22. I rarely spend vast sums of money on clothes.

23. I haven’t downloaded any new music onto my ipod in over a year.

24. I have kissed two men. Not at the same time.

25. I do love a good quiz.